Illusions of Womanhood

Hallo Wonderbeau Everyone! I hope it’s well with your soul?

So I am trying to pick off my musings one by one, not because I have more time, but because I am giving up something (my personal care, at the moment) to write. But currently, I will rather write than brush my teeth. Hopefully, that doesn’t become a habit. 😬 😅

I just read another chapter of a novel from from Notes to Women, an author on this platform, gripping stories she writes, I tell you. I stop over at her “place” on this WordPress “Avenue” to read her latest novel updates, before coming “home” to muse.

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Chronicles of the Crown: Indira to Sapphire

He battles

To possess

He believes

Another possesses

…his wife’s…

heart…

Weekend Writing Prompt #196 – Possess

Beauty Within

Hello Everyone!

I was reading Isaiah 53 until I halted at verse 2. Now, that doesn’t seem long, but it was talking about the Messiah, in a way I had not read before.

Verse two, halted me to a point I had to write what came to mind.

“”For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he had no form nor comeliness and when we shall see him there is no beauty that we should desire him“

What?! Are they implying that Jesus was not handsome?!

Not only that. That verse emphasised that he was not desirable to look upon either — beauty wise.

Then I smiled wryly.

Maybe that was why women were not beating down his door for marriage.

I imagined he must have been comfortable and safe for the women — after all if I read this verse right — Jesus wasn’t a hottie.

But he had a heart of gold; prepared to die for mankind to be saved, and then demonstrated the love, that a married couple should have for each other — how a husband should love his wife and how a wife should relate to her husband — though he was never married.

Then I thought of how women will not find a man attractive because he’s not that attractive. And how women could often miss out, on being with a good man, like Jesus who may not have been beautiful, comely, attractive.

I just wonder, “How many Jesus-like men do we have, that single women are missing out on?!”

This is a sore subject for a lot of women. They miss out on the right kind of man because they are looking for the right kind of look, rather than looking at the heart of the man — his ability and willingness to love, to cherish, guide, befriend and protect.

Most times we just befriend them and make ourselves the matchmaker; deciding who is good or not good enough for him, without thinking we could be that woman.

Why befriend a man you can’t marry?

Why befriend him? Especially if you know that he wants more than friendship with you?

I know you have to pray and ask for God’s direction, but make sure, that you are not throwing away something good because he does not look hot enough.

We usually can sense a good man when we see him. Make your choice! Do not play with a man’s feelings.

And don’t stand in the way.

Don’t be the gatekeeper standing in the way, to scrutinize any woman that might be the woman, you have refused to be, for him.

Be woman enough, to make your decision and stand with it — even if and when you have to stand alone.

Stay safe, stay healthy and SHALOM 🍋

Moving On

“I’m leaving Brad”, NiAnn said with quiet conviction.

“Praise the Lord”, Ximena declared looking like the true follower of Christ she was, howbeit a little dramatic.

Zoe rolled her eyes. “Come on Ximena. Like seriously?” 

“What”, Ximena asked the glaring NiAnn with wide eyed innocence. “Isn’t it good to praise the Lord?” 

NiAnn huffed and looked away.

“Well yes, it’s good to praise the Lord”, Zoe replied with a look on face that says I can’t believe I’m having this ridiculous argument with you. “But now isn’t the time to say it out loud!” 

Ximena was relishing her cup of herbal tea, as she peered at her fav peers with muted mischief in her sparkling cinnamon eyes. This was an answer to prayer. And she had praised God for granting her request of detoxifying her friend’s life of toxic people. And Brad was one of them. She most certainly wouldn’t mourn about it. 

She swallowed her witty comeback with her tea, so NiAnn can spill the tea on what happened. 

“So. What happened?” Zoe asked

“Freda is pregnant and Brad’s the father.” NiAnn rubbed her elbow like she normally did when she was upset.

Zoe gasped, “What? Again?”

Ximena merely raised her brows, as she kept sipping her tea. How extraordinary, she thought sarcastically. 

“I thought he promised you he was done with her?” Zoe queried.

“He changed his mind again.” NiAnn looked sad but with a new strength that says she would be okay.

Praise God. Ximena thought, as she kept observing her friend.

“I was beginning to feel like the interloper. He may have divorced Freda on paper, but I wish it didn’t take me this long to realize, he’s still married to her in his heart.”

“I’m so sorry, NiA”, a concerned Zoe tried to console her.

“That or he’s just doesn’t want to fully committ to anyone. Be it Freda, me or anyone.” NiAnn continued in quiet contemplation. 

“You were right, Ximena. I was his, but he was never mine.” 

Ximena softened, “Hey. You know I love you too much to want to be right about something like this. You just need to learn to stay away from complicated people and trying to rescue them.” 

“Perhaps you should pursue a career as a Fire Fighter. I hear the men there are hot.” Zoe winked

They laughed.

“Speaking of careers. My e-commerce website has picked up speed. I closed five very profitable deals last night!” NiAnn bounced in her seat with barely concealed excitement, a huge smile on her face and a sparkle in her hazel eyes.

“Praise the Lord!“, Zoe declared in happiness for her friend’s success.

“Hallelujah!” The girls chorused

Three cups click in the air in celebration as the three friends laughed. The laughter of reassurance that where life is, hope abides. 

https://puttingmyfeetinthedirt.com/2020/08/01/august-writing-prompts-3/ #21. I was his, but he was never mine.

Fight, Kim. Not Run (Yet)

Hello, Wonderfully Made Folks! I know it’s hard on a lot of us, as we are required to stay home and dress like a surgeon, anytime we have a (very important) NEED to go out. But I believe like one heroine says, “this too shall pass”.

Thirty minutes prior to typing this post, I was watching on Instagram, Monique, an Oscar Award winner, boxing in the gym. And she was encouraging us to fight for our health and well-being.

Then I watched a commentary, about a Black soul singer whose name is being snatched from her, by a singing group who happen to be mostly white. I said mostly because they look white to me.

The name they are both dragging is Lady A. What I learnt from this though, is this:

Focusing on growth is good, but you need to PROTECT your brand like it’s worth one trillion. Copyright ©️ and safeguard your works, ideas, name… everything, so if anyone wants to blindside or rob you, they would have to pay dearly for the attempt.

Now I’m race-right/light/good, fighting against race-wrong/evil/dark. My racial ideology consists of more than colour, culture, or location.

But I am aware that racism and racial superiority complex exist and many black people are at the receiving end of having their ideas, works, brand and names stolen from them; and the system seems biased in favour of the thieves. 

Then the coup de grace happened, while I was watching a commentary of Kanye & Kim’s current situation. And that just drove me here to speak my mind.

Already, I have been seeing and hearing their names being mentioned with tension, with some folks being too gleeful about it.

Now, when glee is laced with the mention of this couple, you know it is not a jolly time for the couple. I’m not a fan of either, because I can’t relate to their lifestyle, but that doesn’t warrant wishing them ill will, now does it?

Well, according to the commentator (who was sounding too sunny by the way, but I would like to think that’s his natural manner of speaking), Kanye had tweeted that his wife, Kim, is a white supremacist! That among other accusations. (What! On twitter — in public– for goodness sake!)

You know. This is why I tried to encourage us in the first paragraph of this post. Because this stay-at-home pandemic seems to be shaking “things” out of people. 

Maybe it’s having to stay indoors all day every day with people you hardly spend time with, that is pushing people to the limit of their endurance. Dr D.K. Olukoya once said, that when people are shaken like a bottle, it’s what is in them that will come out. If nothing is in them, nothing will come out!

The world is going through shaking, and a lot is coming out.

Back to the couple.

So Kim’s reply was that she is considering divorce. Well, my humble opinion is that Kim should consider fighting on Kanye’s turf.

When I say fight here’s what I mean:

Kanye: My wife is a white supremacist etc…

Kim: Hey husband!😲 Take that back! That isn’t funny😐

See? That’s fighting. Since he’s decided to publicly accuse her, then she should publicly reply him. Like they are having a private argument/conversation gone public. Politeness is required and easy to do, because typing your thoughts and response, is slower than a verbal response. Written words can be edited for better understanding and communication, but no spoken words.

Running away and not addressing what he has tweeted, puts a stamp of credibility to his accusations.

I understand that it hurts because a husband is supposed to be his wife’s cover, confidant, mentor, friend, and supportive critique (not public!) among other things.

However, I don’t know what has been brewing behind closed doors. But whatever the case may or may not be, don’t/shouldn’t they have a marriage counsellor in their corner, they can talk to anytime talking to each other, is not working?

I had to give you a preview of what I had fed on before reaching this couple’s issue. Because I think that is what inspired the theme fight, in this post.

It was Nelson Mandela who said, “Speak to a man in a language he understands, and it goes to his head. Speak to a man in his own language, and it goes to his heart.”

Obviously, speaking to Kanye’s head might be out of the question for Kim. But I think she ought to fight, by speaking to his heart in his own language.

At this moment, he’s speaking twitter. Good. Then have a conversation with and engage him on twitter.

I heard she’s a lawyer now. It’s time to use those skills to defend herself in the court of public opinion and bring her husband to heel.

I guess it’s for the best, she have a “Red Table Talk” kind of conversation, with her husband on twitter.

She needs to politely ask him to prove his accusations and if he can’t or his accusations are found to be untrue, she must firmly and respectfully demand he gives her a public twitter apology — since that’s where it became public.

Fight Kim, but don’t run away by getting a divorce. 

Stay safe and healthy!

Shalom!

https://puttingmyfeetinthedirt.com/2020/07/01/july-writing-prompts-2/ #10 Regretful Happenings 

Entanglements

 Hello, Wonderfully made! I hope we are staying safe and healthy.

From the topic, some of us may already guess what this is about. But just in case you don’t, I will brief you.

Jada Smith suggested that she got “entangled” with another man while she was on a marriage hiatus.

She said this to her husband on her show, where it’s just two people at a table. This time it was her husband and her.

Very interesting.

I don’t like to talk about people especially when they have done what’s wrong — in my view.

However, I want to address the issues surrounding this saga and there are many angles to this story.

In this post, I want to talk about the other man. 

It seems it was the other man who first mentioned the entanglement.

He talked about how it affected him and it turns out he’s releasing a song titled “Entanglement”.

I think he feels rejected. Or dumped. And perhaps used. Whichever it was, I’m sure it doesn’t feel good.

I have yet to watch the interview, August (one of his names) gave. The little I have heard especially from Jada, turned my stomach. As I type this I feel slightly nauseous.

I think he should have expected this though, but for reasons, best known to him and Jada, he’s traumatised by the entanglement. Coupled with the fact that he was going through some issues that may need a psychologist to fix. Apparently, he and she chose to handle it in-house since rumour has it he’s somewhat a family friend. They got closer and the rest is still unfolding.

Again I believe part of what ails the man is The sting of rejection. 

Apparently, he assumed they would become a couple. That, or he later realised he had become too emotionally attached to her and whatever did happen between them, that he is now suffering withdrawal syndrome or is it symptoms?

Either or, he’s so pained or miffed about it, that could no longer keep it to himself: that something happened between him and a married woman during her marital break time. 

To all and sundry, let’s take these lessons:

• Do not get entangled — at all. If you do, you will feel trapped. Actually, you will be trapped. So if you cherish your freedom, anything that isn’t clear and concise, just steer clear. 
• Steer clear of a romantic interest who is married! Really, you can’t win. Rather, it will do you in. You will be sucked into all their issues that extends to their children and spouse. Besides, karma is not extinct. Do to others what you want to be done to you and this warning wouldn’t be necessary. 
• Respect other people’s feelings and relationships. I’m talking of those “they” are in relationships with or married to and the children.
• Respect yourself. If you have a proper value structure. There are troubles that you skip by because you refuse to demean yourself in any way.
• Seek help in the appropriate places from trained professionals. It is way too easy to become infatuated to the person who is trying to help you. And next thing you know, you have built a castle or city in the sky featuring that person as your partner. By the time you realise they either see you as a sibling or their child, you are already emotionally entangled, if not mentally also. A professional knows how to assist you, without leaving you worse than they met you. 
• Maintain emotional distance. You don’t want to get entangled? Don’t get emotionally involved. This pandemic has reinforced some traditions that kept people from starting something they should not have began, to start with. There are cultures that had what I will call gender segregation. Women had their quarters, so did men. They only mixed in supervised circumstances. Even at social gatherings, women sat on one side while men sat at the other. In such arrangements, temptations are minimal with little or no opportunity to yield. Keep physical and emotional distance from the opposite gender, that isn’t in your nuclear family.

The ripple effect of this entanglement saga is far-reaching. Like an octopus with many tentacles.

I will be back to post my perspective on the other angles.

Stay safe, stay healthy in your body, soul and spirit.

Shalom!

https://puttingmyfeetinthedirt.com/2020/07/01/july-writing-prompts-2/ 2. City in the Sky, 5. The Sting of Rejection

Are we Humane Beings?

I was on youtube watching “Conversations with America”. Bishop T.D. Jakes was the host featuring a group of senior police officers, retired police officers and a psychologist who works with the army on mental health.

The topic was Police Brutality. And the Bishop was asking a lot of questions to understand why it happens and what causes it.

One of the officers said they are not always taught to be human, but to just get the job done.

And the psychologist said, “If you need to be taught to be human, you shouldn’t be hired at all.”

Someone in the comment section highlighted that statement and this response just hit me. I just kept writing. Here it is:

Unfortunately, we all have to “become” human beings. Remember the story of the “Good Samaritan”? All those who ought to know better walked past the wounded man. How many times have we as individuals “walked past”?

There are people who wouldn’t have joined the protest if they still had to go to work or identify with some “fraternity”. But priorities have narrowed down to food, shelter, health and security. Fear of “it could have been me” got many to rush out realising what they have probably been ignoring or not paying adequate attention to and not taking practical steps, toward a society of equity.

That’s why being born again prevails over just being okay, with being a “good person”. 

It takes courage and a certain level of God’s anointing to do the right thing, ALWAYS. Especially, when it’s “dangerous”, inconvenient, or when we’re at risk of losing something of value.

Becoming humane is a journey we all need to take with love for the service of God and humanity.

What do you think?

Courage!

I once…no, twice wrote, about courage. I mentioned that courage in some aspects may not, and usually does not translate to courage in all aspects.

I know how that feels. I have never in public spoken against any injustice that has translated to violence from the unjust. I suppose that’s what they are doing: Psychological warfare. If they can use a few as an example of how cruel and brutal they are, then people will shut up out of fear of being next.

Unfortunately, there will always be a next, as long as people are too trapped in fear to speak against injustices, violence, assaults, and all that is attached to it.

I say:

By the authority God has given me in Christ;

I am against any kind of assault on women and children.

I am against lack of equity for all.

I am against racism — wherever it may come from.

I am against rape. Be it sexual, economical, or cultural.

I stand with truth, justice, equity, fairness, respect, morality, and security for all.

“God is my refuge and strength… therefore will I not fear…” Psalm 46

Let righteousness reign in every part of the world, in Jesus Christ name. Amen!

https://wp.me/p1mHRD-cNi

Oh What a Year!

Hello Everyone!

Permit me to say, it’s been busy for everyone, as our lives as we knew it (yes knew) has been rearranged, reshuffled, upended and any other word you can think of. 

And no. No one asked whether we wanted this change, but here we are!

For some of us, there has been no difference, or at least not much of a difference.

I suppose this is an exam on how flexible we really are as individuals.

How flexible was our schedules, our lifestyle, our minds, among other things?

One thing about flexibility is that, it’s when you need to twist to safe your life or at least assert your freedom, that it becomes obvious how flexible or rusty you are.

A lot of us have pulled a muscle or two, in this pandemic. It was either twist or break! Since breaking isn’t an option, twist it is. And if you are rusty, well…sorry about the muscle pull.

Funny, how some who don’t believe in Jesus Christ are wishing for the second coming.

As a Christian, I seriously doubt this is it, though I advice you prepare yourself by giving your life to Christ, reading the Bible and obeying the promptings of God in your conscience.

Be that as it may, we all need to find what our new normal is. 

Let us as individuals, look at what we do have and work with that to provide the essentials for ourselves.

I think no one can claim they have priority issues; but just in case: It’s food and shelter. I doubt you or I need much of any clothing to stay indoors.

For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love and of a sound mind. 2Timothy 1:7

Stay safe, healthy, and at peace.

Shalom!

Untwist the Truth

What do we do about people who twist the truth and insult those who point it out?

As a Christian a lot is expected of you in God’s Kingdom and in relating with others for the development of all.

Some people who I’m beginning to think are trying to create hype, are always verbally attacking anyone whose expression and interpretation contradicts their own.

Hard as I try understanding people whose lives aren’t that sterling, but think it’s their duty to impose corrections filled with faults on everybody else, sounds hilarious, except I’m not laughing. 

Reading the Bible is a study in mystery that I think someone should write a book on.

The Word of God is a living breathing Word, powerful enough to make flesh. 

It’s a cleanser, purifier, transformer, healer, comforter, shelter, edifier and so much more.

It is also a double edged sword and a mirror.

And if you think too highly of yourself, you are likely to see only what you want to see in the mirror-like sword and then point it against others.

Your reason or should I say motive for reading the Bible is more important than the reading itself — God forgive me if saying that is a sin.

Because you read your motives into what you are reading. Therefore if you are looking to justify yourself in what is wrong, you will likely find an example that may seem to agree with you.

The right way to read God’s Word is to have the motive to right your ways to God’s satisfaction. Anything less than that is no different from reading history or the law. 

God’s Word is HIStory. If we want something different from that then we should write our own story.

Plagiarism is still a crime, I believe.

Reading into God’s Word what isn’t there is no different from plagiarism.

The last statement of the Bible in the Book of Revelations is clear on how God feels about twisting HIS Truth.

It’s save and wise even, not to get it twisted.

Shalom!

https://wp.me/p9YJOH-v7 
https://hopeandstay.com/2019/09/05/breaking-spells-and-shedding-dragon-skins-when-narcissus-refuses-the-mirror/