Woman... Hand-made by the King of kings
Celebration with a Little Kitsch
“Thyme’s toes, Indira!” MayRose whispered in mortified amusement at some of the guests’ garish clothing. “Why is my sight tortured with kitsch colours for today’s Celebration of Harmony?!”
“They are trying to portray the symbols of my parents’ kingdom. I find their effort endearing, given the short notice.” Indira smiled at them in sentimental appreciation.
“My Queen”, A province chief and his lady made obeisance.
Indira warmly welcomed them.
Weekend Writing Prompt #198 – Kitsch
There’s an African proverb that says, “A lone 🌲 tree cannot make a forest.”
This talks about a unity of purpose, to make things happen.
It’s often said, that no one is an island. We are not created to stand alone in everything. We’re made to collaborate, to form relationships.
Life is about collaboration. You can buy, only because someone is selling. You have shelter because someone was willing to build. You have a business because someone needs your services and is willing to patronise you. You have a job because someone needs your skills and is willing to hire you. You need others and others need you as well. It is co-dependence and inter-dependence. No one can truly do anything, all by themselves. We’re not just built that way.
Life is meant to be shared, and there’s love in sharing.
Does that mean we should hitch our wagon to just anyone’s?
No, of course not.
But we should not make the mistake of going the high road of not needing anybody. We can choose who to associate with. We simply have to choose wisely. We need to choose people who can help us grow and who we can help grow. That’s how a forest works.
Choosing the wrong company or choosing to remain in wrong company is like, trying to grow under a huge tree. The huge tree might seem like a shield from the harsh realities of life, but in the real sense, its preventing the trees under it from getting adequate nutrition directly from the elements, for proper growth. Neither will they have deep roots, because the roots of the huge tree will not only absorb most of the earth’s nutrients, but it will not give space for any tree under it or it’s immediate environs to take root.
Have you ever seen a tree growing under a huge tree, become as big as that tree? Trees growing under huge trees are limited to living in the shadows of the huge tree.
There’s a time to “get thee out from among them”, so that you can grow to your highest potential. But you still need thr right people to make that happen.
However, don’t let the absence of help or assistance stop you from venturing out on your own. It only takes one step of faith at a time. It is well.
I find that word scary, actually. I mean, I understand it’s importance in life and development. But I will like to say, mentoring is not for everyone. Especially, if you are not confident enough to know your mind and do what you believe is right, when everyone — including your mentor — sees what you plan on doing as mission impossible.
I’m very touchy about someone telling me what I must do. I find the ‘must do’ vibe, a bit controlling and maybe manipulative.
Feel free to correct me, if you believe I don’t know what the heck I’m talking about.
I think a mentor should be like a psychologist. Listening, giving gentle prompts until you find the answer yourself. A guide, a friend.
Mentor sounds to me like lecturer, as opposed to compassionate teacher, who helps you understand and apply what you understand.
Interestingly, the dictionary meaning of mentor are: guide, advisor, teacher, counsellor. So why am I opposed to it?
Well, I think it’s probably because I haven’t met the right person or I’m not disciplined enough to handle the position of a mentee. I have had few admirable big-sister kind of women come into my life, but I end up pushing them away or avoiding them.
For one, they end up giving me assignments. Very good thing. But I don’t like assignments, because of the time limit attached to it. So I end up running away. I can’t help but feel bad about all the other reasons I don’t have a mentor or an active mentor. I prefer to use the word friend than mentor. The tone and vibe I get from the word mentor sounds like sitting in a stifling classroom, getting stiff instructions and ultimatums to either shape up or be punished.
What a mentor really means is part of my definition of friendship.
So I think I will settle with friendship.
With a wry smile on my face, it just occurred to me that maybe the reason, why I have had a hard time finding and keeping friends, is because I was seeking mentorship in friendship.
I’m beginning to understand why having a friend seemed like a tall order. But in my defence, I was mentoring those I thought were my friends; even if I didn’t know, that was what I was doing. I thought I was advising them. They probably ran away from me, because of my advice.
But is there something wrong with guiding, advising, counselling someone you care for and expecting the same in return?
Am I confused or expecting too much?